


There can be no end, only new beginnnings

by botherbutterfly



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Cybernetics, F/M, Major Character Injury, Post-Canon, Post-Mass Effect 3
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-16
Updated: 2019-03-25
Packaged: 2019-10-29 14:43:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,284
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17809913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/botherbutterfly/pseuds/botherbutterfly
Summary: She promised Kaidan that he would see her again. That he would hold her again. And, she always tried her hardest to keep her promises.





	1. Prologue: Could this be the end...

**Author's Note:**

> Post ME3 destroy ending. I only recently discovered the joy of Mass Effect, and romanced Kaidan all the way through my first play through. And, knew I couldn't leave it there.
> 
> This Shepard was an Orphan, sole-survivor & paragon

Shepherd looks at the three paths ahead of her. She knew which one she should choose. The one which guaranteed peace with synthetics, the one which rewrote the DNA of the galaxy. Synthesis. She hesitated, taking a through hesitant steps along that path when Kaidan’s face popped into her mind. The look on his face as she put him back on the Normandy and ran towards the beam. How broken he was when he saw her again on Horizon after her first death. Taking a deep breathe, she turned around and headed down the right-hand path. She didn’t want to die, she had too much to live for. She knew it was selfish of her, she knew it could kill EDI, and the geth. And, she knew she’d have to live with that. And, there was always the chance that they could fix them. But, she wanted to live, and she had a promise to keep. She promised Kaidan that he would see her again. That he would hold her again. And, she always tried her hardest to keep her promises. Finally, she found herself at the end of the path, and started shooting. She saw the faces of the people she had lost to get her this far, she still wasn’t sure she was making the right choice, but it was the only choice where she had a chance of living. And, didn’t she deserve that? After everything she’s done, why does she have to sacrifice her life, and happiness to save the galaxy? As the crucible started up, and started the process of eliminating the Reapers, the citadel started falling apart around her. Wounded as she was, she was unable to dodge the debris falling everywhere, and instead sank to the floor in the hope that maybe it wouldn’t fall on her.

 

* * *

 

 

She felt like literal death, even more than when she’d told Anderson that hours before. Groaning, she pushed at the scrap metal covering her, but even with all of her cybernetics, she wasn’t strong enough to move it. She struggled, crying out from the pain and effort, tears streaming from her eyes. All she knew was pain before she blacked out again.

 

* * *

 

 

The next time she woke she heard voices. Thought she heard her name being called. Groaning, she tried to call out, tried to get them to help her. But, nothing came out but a croak, a croak that wasn’t loud enough for the far away voices to hear. And, soon they seemed to fade into the distance. She tried to move again, because everything had stopped hurting. The battle medic in her knew this was a bad thing. But, her brain was all fuzzy, and so was her body. She almost felt like she was floating before she drifted back into oblivion.


	2. Chapter 1: Lost and Found

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It had been three days since the Normandy had crash landed, and they still weren’t exactly sure which system they were in, let alone which planet they were on.

It had been three days since the Normandy had crash landed, and they still weren’t exactly sure which system they were in, let alone which planet they were on.  And, had no way of contacting Earth, or anywhere else for that matter.    Which meant that fixing what they could, was their top priority.  It was all hands on deck.  But Kaidan had found himself in Shepard’s cabin, reading through the damage reports, working out where to prioritise their work crews.  He knew he probably could have done this in the CIC, or well anywhere else.  But, he needed to be close to her, or at least something that reminded him of her.  They’d all heard the reports before they’d been ordered to jump away from the Crucible.  Shepard had gotten onto the Citadel and opened the arms.  She’d saved them all, but at what cost.  He couldn’t bring himself to believe that he could have lost her again.  Not until he sees her body.  No matter what anyone else said, he wasn’t giving up on her this time.

“Major?”  Traynor’s voice over the intercom interrupted him from his thoughts. 

“Go ahead.”

“The QEC is up and running, sir.  I thought you’d want to know.”

“Thank you, Traynor.  I’ll be right down.”

Kaidan sighed, running a hand through his hair.  Suddenly afraid of what news this might bring.  Taking a deep breath, he headed towards the elevator and down to the CIC.

 

* * *

  

Stepping into the vidcom room, he pushed at a few buttons and quickly managed to get hold of Admiral Hackett.  He saluted as soon as it connected, and gave the Admiral a run down of the situation with the Normandy.  All while inside he was screaming, fighting to ask what had happened to Shepard.

“I’m glad to see you’re all in one piece, Major.  And, I wish I had better news for you.” 

Kaidan tensed, unsure if he really wanted to hear whatever the Admiral was about to say. 

“The good news is, whatever Shepard did, has called all of the reapers on earth, and just about everywhere else we’ve managed to get ahold of.  The bad news is, that after the Crucible fired, it, the citadel and every mass relay fell apart.  Now, parts of the citadel are still intact, but the rest of it has been raining down on Earth for the last few days.  It’s going to be a hell of a clean up.”

“Shepard?”  Kaidan asked, unable to hold it back in longer, the pain in his voice was palpable, even in just that one word.

“We’re hoping she’s still on the intact part of the citadel, it’s power is still on, and it seems like environmental controls are still active.  I’ve sent a team to search for her, but there’s still a lot of ground to cover.  I’ll let you know the instance we find anything.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“Now, get back to fixing your ship.  Without the mass relays, it’s going to be a long trip home, Major.  Hackett out.”

 

* * *

 

 

Kaidan summoned everyone to the briefing room.  Knowing that he needed to tell everyone exactly what was going on.  Knowing that they deserved to know what they were in for.  But, also knowing he wasn’t as good at the morale boosting speeches as Shepard was.  God, he wished she were here with him.

Once everyone had gathered, he explained the situation.  Luckily, the FTL drives hadn’t been too badly damaged, and Adams, Daniels and Donelly were all optimistic that they could get it up and running in a day or two, while Tali concentrated on fixing the AI core.  Everything else they figured, could be finished off once they were on their way.

 

* * *

 

“We’ve found them, Major.” Was the first thing Hackett said when he answered the call.  And, Kaidan felt his heart jump into his throat, it was pounding so hard, he could feel the impending migraine a mile off. 

“How is she?”

“Not good, she’s in intensive care.  The doctors think that her cybernetics were the only thing that kept her alive.  So, at least Cerberus was good for something.  We’ve contacted Miranda Lawson, most of the doctors don’t know the first thing about what a lot of her implants do.  So, we figured we should call in the woman that put them there in the first place.”

Kaidan felt his world crumble around him, and his face must have shown that.

“Don’t worry, Major.  She’s a fighter.  She’s survived worse than this.”

Kaidan couldn’t help but laugh brokenly at that.  “That she has.”  He paused, calming himself.  “You said them?”

“We found Admiral Anderson, too.  Sadly, he didn’t make it.  I thought you and your crew would want to know.  I’m sorry, Major.”

“Thank you, sir.  I am too.”  Kaidan said, composing himself once again.

“I’ll leave you to break it to your crew.  Hackett out.”

 


End file.
